we're blogging at a bar
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
