hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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