You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
