ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Randomize
