I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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