i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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