you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
