I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
