Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
