Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
