ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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