Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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