In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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