the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
