You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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