i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
