it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
