16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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