So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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