Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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