You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
