Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
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you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
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I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
is that a dick in a sweater?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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