I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
