Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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