Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
