summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
