did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize
