i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
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