Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
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I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
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What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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