Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
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