I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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