idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
