Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize
