Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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