I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
