it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize