He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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