I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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