One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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