I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize