i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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