I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
