OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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