I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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