we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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