i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
