OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize