I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
