I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
