If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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