Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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