I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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